queenofdisco
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It was the day before yesterday and the day before tomorrow, in an unspecified age of unscrupulous magic and somewhat likeable heroes, whom of course paid weekly tax to their grannies who in turn could go on asking what day it was each hour of their grandson’s visit.
See now our hero! BaldyArseMc’CleftChinicus.
BaldyArseMc’CleftChinicus was no ordinary hero, but no hero ever claims to be ordinary or else they don’t get their royalties, not that they did, but BaldyArseMc’CleftChinicus was different! If bards sang his name he’d bloody well have that royalty check!
BaldyArseMc’CleftChinicus was a Hobbe who had long lost memory of being Hobbe for now he believed to be a full grown Troll, a ice Troll to be exact. Throughout winter he shivered not! But did indeed sh*t his kecks often from improper lack of nutrition (Ice Trolls eat snow)
In so of being absent minded of believing to be a Hobbe he hadn’t ever shaved since he fell off the sausage roll stand in Bowerstone market, he had banged his head quite so hard that now he was unable to remove his frying pan from his head and since he was an Ice Troll it didn’t occur to him that he was wearing a frying pan with a stale omelette within.
Bards sang of this rich bearded brain damaged Hobbe all over the western border, the bards did so ever wonder why this Hobbe was ever so rich, of course when they did sing they had regretted so, for Ol’ BaldyArseMc’CleftChinicus came ah running and throwing clumps of dirt at their lutes jabbering and slurring from what could only be described as a broken jaw and rabies. He so did slobber as he whacked them as he stole their purses.
One sheriff theorised that BaldyArseMc’CleftChinicus didn’t even know what money was, but the little Hobbe did have a merry jingle, if anyone was to ever mug BaldyArseMc’CleftChinicus they’d be a rich man indeed for it is said! That BaldyArseMc’CleftChinicus
Slobbers the tone-deaf, and mugs the muggers, the latter appears to work, the former is just jolly bad healthcare.
And so ends our rather pointless tale of BaldyArseMc’CleftChinicus!
See now our hero! BaldyArseMc’CleftChinicus.
BaldyArseMc’CleftChinicus was no ordinary hero, but no hero ever claims to be ordinary or else they don’t get their royalties, not that they did, but BaldyArseMc’CleftChinicus was different! If bards sang his name he’d bloody well have that royalty check!
BaldyArseMc’CleftChinicus was a Hobbe who had long lost memory of being Hobbe for now he believed to be a full grown Troll, a ice Troll to be exact. Throughout winter he shivered not! But did indeed sh*t his kecks often from improper lack of nutrition (Ice Trolls eat snow)
In so of being absent minded of believing to be a Hobbe he hadn’t ever shaved since he fell off the sausage roll stand in Bowerstone market, he had banged his head quite so hard that now he was unable to remove his frying pan from his head and since he was an Ice Troll it didn’t occur to him that he was wearing a frying pan with a stale omelette within.
Bards sang of this rich bearded brain damaged Hobbe all over the western border, the bards did so ever wonder why this Hobbe was ever so rich, of course when they did sing they had regretted so, for Ol’ BaldyArseMc’CleftChinicus came ah running and throwing clumps of dirt at their lutes jabbering and slurring from what could only be described as a broken jaw and rabies. He so did slobber as he whacked them as he stole their purses.
One sheriff theorised that BaldyArseMc’CleftChinicus didn’t even know what money was, but the little Hobbe did have a merry jingle, if anyone was to ever mug BaldyArseMc’CleftChinicus they’d be a rich man indeed for it is said! That BaldyArseMc’CleftChinicus
Slobbers the tone-deaf, and mugs the muggers, the latter appears to work, the former is just jolly bad healthcare.
And so ends our rather pointless tale of BaldyArseMc’CleftChinicus!
